Hiya,
Hope you're all doing really well,
I'm doing a quick post tonight, whilst snuggled up in bed trying to sleep. Anyone who knows me knows I hate to dwell and focus on the negatives, life's too short, but tonight I'm feeling a little bit fragile in fighting a chest/nasal infection so bare with me <3
Whilst being stuck in over the last few days, despite being too tired to study, I have begun watching YouTube videos, and there is one lady in particular who does fashion/beauty/lifestyle blogging, that is hands down fab on its own, but I also find her so relatable due to the fact that she also has M.E.
Through my own journey of being ill, there has been times when I am very aware that noone sees the suffering that can be endured. This is because you only put your 'best' pictures on social media. The ones when you're at your best, absolutely giving it everything you've got, because why shouldn't you? However because of this, it is easy to understand why people may not see your condition in its truest light. Now, there is nothing you can do about how people may interpret things. We are all guilty of lack of understanding or just not realising what a person has to deal with, though never being able to walk in their shoes, but one thing you can do is listen.
To be listened to is all anyone wants.
If you can possibly try and empathise it's even better, but just by listening you're acknowledging there's a reason to listen. And, for anyone to talk about anything (condition/problem/story/experience) there is ALWAYS a reason to listen.
We are all guilty of letting things go over our heads through busyness, but I think it should be our aim from this day forward to actively listen and try and understand anyone who wants to be heard. We should try and help, not ignore. And this help, love and compassion, should make us closer not frustrated or defeated through ignorance or powerlessness. We all have the capacity to be more than that.
Anyone who has been poorly long term will know that there is no point putting the pictures where you feel worse, up. For one, at the time of being ill, you feel too poorly to upload anything, secondly, even if you could upload you definitely don't want the world to see you temporarily defeated by this awful 'thing' that isn't really you as a person, it's just come and interrupted normal life. Thirdly, you definitely don't want to be reminded of how ill you may feel at the time, you just want normal life to resume and you certainly don't want to think of it again.
With a chronic illness, you will not go to your friends saying "oh I feel soooo ill" , you will say "I'm fine" or even "I'm good", and that's only when prompted to speak about how you feel, else you'd rather not pass judgement as, for one there's no point dwelling, and also you find people only want to hear good news and don't know what to say to the bad. Thanks okay, that's human. But it is precisely the opposite of what people need when they're ill.
People who feel fragile, poorly or drained, don't need you to move mountains (although if this got you better, they wish you could), but for you just to say, I get it, it must be so difficult, I'm sure you'll feel better tomorrow, you got this.
I think this is just what I needed to understand in dealing with ill people, before I got ill myself, and so I thought by writing about it it may show a different perspective to think about.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this,
Have a lovely night,
Love Molly xxx
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